Kate O Brian is quoted as saying: Art is the only thing that can go on mattering once it has stopped hurting.
This is so true…the creative process never happens easy. There are varying degrees of difficulties but anyone who says anything contrary is living in another dimension. The countdown for the Schools creative process (the recital) has begun and each day I watch for different communicative signs of what lies ahead. ‘This’ student is also performing at another function on the same night (this means move the item forward so that she can leave early…such a rush you know being in two places at the same time!!!) But do I want the item right in the beginning of the evening? No one cares. Now one begins to watch parental powers of organisation come into play. I as a teacher will have to concede….once again no choices…just do.
This Recital is costing a tremendous amount in finance and personal effort. The personal effort is part of the job and is done unconditionally. The financial aspect hurts the pocket at one of the most challenging times of the year.
I wonder if it is really true …this quote of Malcolm X:
“If you don’t stand for something you will fall for anything.” because if it is I am pretty much done for within this space I presently find myself. I have tried to stand as firmly and as fairly to bring this Recital to fruition but the ‘people’ factor is in the forefront of all decision making.
Still….there are moments to be truly valued and savoured…like when a student comes on stage and has made her entrance and exit with true awareness of what performance is about….the moment when a smile slowly begins to emerge over a troubled and shy face….or when the eyes in a student light up because today she has achieved the double pirouette on stage. Its the moment when you get a random hug from behind…or when a little one holds on to you….never saying anything for there is no need of words from a kindred spirit. I have some remarkable students who are so adept at ‘reading’ who I really am…and they,as only children and animals can do, accept me unconditionally as I am. The parents however lack the same inner expertise.
A beautiful lady is an accident of nature. A beautiful old lady is a work of art. – Louis Nizer. To many of my students I am old….but I hope with compassion and wisdom old…like the first people of the earth…the native American Indians…always with a stillness of mind and inner wisdom ‘old’.